Busy, I have been. I don't know why, but it seems that I am having more work and problems I can cope. This is getting serious. It is affecting me mentally and physically. People see me as a guy that always go on offs and just slacking at home doing nothing. But in actually sense, I am doing much more than I can handle. I just pretend and put on a front that all is well. I cannot take it anymore.
I have been dealing with politics in the office, nagging mum and most of all, friends who thinks that I am getting all emotional. Well, for once I am really upset. I am just trying to make things happen. We have to plan for meetups and in view of the tight schedule that everyone is having, it seems almost essential. And it definately is not fair when I try to plan something, asking for suggestions, people just tell me, "Anything"! It is a word that I can hardly comprehend at then is point. I asked for a suggestion! Even "Macdonalds" equates to an answer!
For once, I am really upset. I do not know if it is due to the emotional built up from the environment or is it because I need a break. I am so looking forward to a break for myself. Not being judged and having to be commented on. Maybe I am just lonely! I don't know. It seems weird for me to be saying this. I have always thought that I have many friends. But now, I feel lonely! Maybe because I am starting to realise that I close friends of mine are just trickling away.....like water. I should not blame them, as they are just trying to spend more time with the ones they truly love.
I am disgusted by my own truth in the above. I have never been this upset or un-politically correct. May today be a better day. And people be nice to me.
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"They are trying to spend more time with the ones they truly love"? Hmmm...is everything ok? Why don't you relax and take things as it comes over the next few weeks? There's no need to stress bout some things.
I guess that lonely feeling is creeping in because each of us seem to be bogged down with our own stuff, and not spending much time together. Some of us are trying hard to cope with the recent changes in our lives. At least for me, that's the case. I'm pretty sure its the case for BL And IC too. Although I've really really been very busy with work. Honestly. It's really gross how working life is. You don't even have time for yourself. Plus, now I have to prepare for the next chapter of my life...
Thanks for planning stuff and all. I appreciate it.
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